Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Cats Galore

Here's a short list of the funnier pets on the PAWS website:

Mister Bojangles:
This gentlemanly mister isn't used to being at a shelter and is a bit confused about why he's no longer at home. Who wouldn't be? He doesn't know it, of course, but Mr. B. is the unfortunate victim of career advancement and relocation.

For regular visitors to our website, you may remember "Melkat" (Martin Luther Kat) who spent some time with us last year.

Please click for larger image to see how a window and some sun makes him happy. Could it be your window? Mister Bojangles hopes so.
Poor Mister Bojangles.

Wylie:
This handsome tuxedo is quite an armful, but a very lovable armful and a classic guy.
He's also the largest cat in the world.

Moxie:

It's great to see you back Foxy Moxie!

Moxie looks kind of drunk in every one of those pictures.

Moxie doesn’t have a tail. The veterinarian who performed the operation calls him her “manufactured Manx!” For quite some time, vets thought he had food allergies because he kept biting at the top of his tail. Finally, his current doc diagnosed cauda equina, a rare disorder affecting the bundle of nerve roots at the lower end of the spinal cord. Since his surgery over a year ago, he has been totally fine and has no trouble running, jumping, or doing any other cat activities that require balance.


Rosie
:

Looks big and scared, kind of like when Kitty runs in when it starts to thunder.

Noah:

Sometimes when you pet Noah inside his enclosure, he gives you that strange open-mouth look called the "flehmen" look. He's just studying the new smell presented to him, not getting ready to bite your hand off!

Why is it called the 'flehmen' look?

With insatiable curiosity, I wikipedia'd it. It's not just some crazy PAWS word they made up.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Friday, September 28, 2007

The Grand Opening

Where we left off...

The hospital is swarming with sorority girls.

FAT MAN: Help! I need to see a doctor right away!

HOSPITAL ASSISTANT: Oh god! Nurse, get this woman up to maternity now! This baby isn't going to wait!

FAT MAN: Hey! I'm a man! I just happen to have a little bit of a weight problem.

HOSPITAL ASSISTANT: Oh ... sorry. What can I do for you?

FAT MAN: I think I have a tapeworm.

HOSPITAL ASSISTANT: You think you have a tapeworm ... are you sure?

QIU: (coming in quickly) Of course he has a tapeworm, the poor man! Why, you can tell just by looking at him! You'd better get that taken care of right away.

FAT MAN: You mean right now?

(QIU hurries man onto table and gets his knife ready to cut FAT MAN's stomach. He then starts slicing)

FAT MAN: Ah! Ah! Ow! What the hell! Give me some anesthesia!

QIU: Anesthesia? You didn't say anything about that when you came in! I mean, we have some, but it's going to cost you another three hundred dollars. So, do you want it or not? Make up your mind.

FAT MAN: (just stammers and keeps saying ow)

QIU: Wait a second ... you know, if we just cut out that tapeworm, there's still going to be little worm eggs floating around inside of you. After you get all sewn up, you might have another worm in ten, fifteen days. Do you want me to give you something to take care of the eggs? If you do, it'll be another hundred and fifty dollars.

(HOSPITAL ASSISTANT gives QIU the thumbs-up)

FAT MAN: Well, hmm, I suppose just do whatever you think is right, Doctor.

QIU: (while still operating on FAT MAN) You know, if you would have this operation done over at Mount Nittany, it'd cost you two, three thousand dollars easy. You're lucky you came here first. All we ask in exchange is for you to spread our name around to your friends. We're totally sanitary here at Ritenour. By the way, you should probably stop back tomorrow afternoon so we can see how the healing process is coming along.

FAT MAN: I think I'm going into shock.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Roger is My Hero

I've been reading the ever-sparkling Roger Ebert's Movie Yearbook 2003 and he writes so many critical gems I must post them.

About Sorority Boys:

"The movie contains no wit, only labored gags involving straight men who don't realize they're trying to pick up a man. (I imagine yokels in the audience responding with the Gradually Gathering Guffaw as they catch on. "Hey Jethro! He don't know she's a guy! Haw! Haw! Haw!)"


About Viva Rock Vegas:

"The movie would be no better and no worse without Gazoo, which is a commentary on both Gazoo and the movie, I think."


About Freddy Got Fingered:

"This movie doesn't scrape the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't below the bottom on the barrel. This movie doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence with barrels."


About Life or Something Like It:

"Someone once said, live every day as if it will be your last. Not just someone once said that. Everyone once said that, over and over again, although Life or Something Like It thinks it's a fresh insight."


About Thomas and the Magic Railroad:

"Very early in Thomas and the Magic Railroad Thomas the Tank Engine and another locomotive are having a conversation. Their eyes roll and we hear voices - but their mouths do not move. No, not at all. This is such an odd effect that I could think of little else during their conversation. In an era when animated dinosaurs roam the earth, ships climb 200-foot walls of water, and Eddie Murphy can play five people in the same scene, is it too much to ask a tank engine to move its lips while speaking?

I think not. Either their mouths should move or their eyes should not roll. Take your pick."


Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Cat Fancy






















This was right after the kitten sneezed on Grace.



































More Bugs on Flowers
















































































































Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Personality Impression Study

I'm not sure how accurate these results are, but they're funny nonetheless. The proctor seemed really interested in talking to me while I was taking the test, but he probably was not so into me after reading the results. Keep in mind that a 50% indicates average, while a 0 means that pretty much everyone else is more ____ than you.

Here's the different areas of personality:

"Extroversion: 36


Friendliness: 59
Gregariousness: 6
Assertiveness: 37
Activity Level: 90
Excitement-Seeking: 14
Cheerfulness:50

Your score on Extraversion is average, indicating you are neither a subdued loner nor a jovial chatterbox. You enjoy time with others but also time alone."

That wasn't so bad, right? It tells me that I like activities, but not ones that involve excitement or making friends. I feel reassured when they tell me that I'm not a jovial chatterbox.


"Agreeableness: 0

Trust: 76
Morality: 3
Altruism: 25
Cooperation: 4
Modesty: 0
Sympathy: 0

Your score on Agreeableness is low, indicating less concern with others' needs than with your own. People see you as tough, critical, and uncompromising."

Oh, no! This isn't good news at all! How did I get a zero! I feel like this is a cause for concern. I don't even remember any questions that had to do with sympathy, but obviously I did not answer them correctly. Test Proctor is definitely not going to be impressed anymore. How could I get a 25 for altruism but a 0 for sympathy? A 3 for morality! Wow!


"Conscientiousness: 73

Self-Efficacy: 97
Orderliness: 6
Dutifulness: 31
Achievement-Striving: 89
Self-Discipline: 91
Cautiousness: 88

Your score on Conscientiousness is high. This means that you set clear goals and pursue them with determinations. People regard you as reliable and hard-working."

Well, that's a little better, right? Right?

"Neuroticism: 43

Anxiety: 43
Anger: 83
Depression: 3
Self-consciousness: 66
Immoderation: 80
Vulnerability: 43

Your score on Neuroticism is average, indicating that your level of emotional reactivity is typical of the general population. Stressful and frustrating situations are somewhat upsetting to you, but you are generally able to get over these feelings and cope with them."

I like knowing that I'm not a complete neurotic case. However, I have some issues here, angry ones! Hah, just kidding. I really don't think I warranted an 83; perhaps on some of the questions I substituted 'cranky' for 'angry'. At least my depression levels are low. I think the Immoderation one is straight on because if I want sweet stuff, then I HAVE to have it. No other options.

"Openness to Experience: 77

Imagination: 64
Artistic Interests: 71
Emotionality: 10
Adventurousness: 61
Intellect: 84
Liberalism: 92

Your score on Openness to Experience is high, indicating you enjoy novelty, variety, and change. You are curious, imaginative, and creative."

Woo hoo! End on a good note! Well, except for my lack of emotionality. I think they're going to forward my results to the FBI to put me on their watch list for sociopaths. Here is the description for the Liberalism catagory:

Psychological liberalism refers to a readiness to challenge authority, convention, and traditional values. In its most extreme form, psychological liberalism can even represent outright hostility towards rules, sympathy for law-breakers, and love ambiguity, chaos, and disorder. Psychological conservatives prefer the security and stability brought by conformity to tradition. Psychological liberalism and conservatism are not identical to political affiliation, but certainly incline individuals toward certain political parties. Your level of liberalism is high.


I had no idea I was such a little hellion. I don't really think it's accurate, because chaos irritates me to no end. Anyway, the test took about an hour and was pretty fun especially since I had to concentrate while that dude was asking me stuff. I'd do it again!

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Travis' Tastings

It starts with a handful of pellets.








Travis carefully selects the most delectable kibbly bit.








The 'maybe it's not so bad' face.











Wait, nevermind.








But anything goes well with a piece of brownie!








Make sure to catch the video.

Sunday, July 8, 2007

Insects on the Ground

This was the first that I noticed because I almost stepped on it. I have a lot of respect for this ant because it's carrying a bug that's about eighty times its size.




I started to notice that there were a lot of bugs on the ground, most of them dead. Or just tired.






This isn't a pretty bug.








Nice.

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Army Guys



















Love is a battlefield, indeed.
























Trampoline Bugs

They're gross yet fascinating at the same time. I wonder how old they are. Stefaan definitely thought I was weird at this point.